Matrimonial Mishaps and Musings

Monday, May 11, 2009

Final Draft- 5 year Wedding Vows

Well here we are, 5 years later, and as I promised we are in Vegas getting married by Elvis.

Our marriage has been a challenging journey. We came together as a couple that was already enduring many things, and over the years our relationship has continued to overcome many obstacles. We have withstood challenges that should have crumpled our relationship and we did so by believing in each other and in our marriage.

I am stubborn as hell and sometimes I push just to see how far I can. But you never waiver, you allow me time and space and provide me with constant support. I have learned a great deal from you, about love, patience, acceptance, and letting go.

I have learned that sometimes, the things you think you need in your life are not really what you need at all. And that if you are careless, those precious moments that make a person’s life worth talking about and remembering, will be missed forever.

As we move forward I promise to try to relax and appreciate our family more, I will continue to grow, I will try to remember that sometimes it does pay to take an extra 5 minutes to enjoy a moment and that dirty dishes are not an earth shattering event.

Today, at this moment, I want to recommit myself to you and our marriage. I cannot wait to see what kind of happiness the rest of our lives together brings. I love you!

Monday, February 16, 2009

Wedding Vows

My husband and I are going to Vegas at the end of March to renew our vows. It's a few months from our 5 year anniversary but it suited our work schedules to do it March rather than July, which is our actual anniversary. I am going to document my vows as I work on them and perfect them for the ceremony.

Enjoy!

1st entry: (my original wedding vows)
When you proposed marriage to be, you said that I have given you the most precious gift in the world, and that your only hope was that you could give something so priceless back to me.

You have already done that. You have put our family before everything else and because of that my love, admiration, and respect for you have become immeasurable. We have come down a long road together, and though the journey hasn't always been smooth it has always been worth it.

As we continue together, I want you to know that whether you are in your finest hour, or having your weakest moment, I am with you. Never above you, never below you, but always beside you. Know that I will love you, honor you and support you, that I will keep all of your secrets and share all of your dreams. Trust that I will listen first, and speak second. That I will remember that every day is precious and never take your love, or the life we have created together for granted. And while I cannot promise you perfection, I can promise that I will be true to myself and therefore true to you and the vows I have taken today as your friend, as your love, and as your wife.

Second Entry:
March 15, 2009 6:02pm

These are some lines, words and phrases that I would like to use. I have thought of some of them, some are lines from songs.

I swear that I will always be there

When I look back over the years since we’ve been married

It’s always better when we are together

I push just to see how far I can

Just kissing you has the ability to bring tears to my eyes

I sleep just to dream you

I have learned so many things for you about love, patience, acceptance, and letting go

I could never love you more than I already do

We have grown so much over the last seven years

It’s hard to believe that we’ve made it here

I gave my heart to you many years ago

You’re the one true thing I know I can believe in

I know that I am not an easy person to live with

I am stubborn as hell

You are not traditional in the ways that you show love, and this took some getting used to.

I have learned to look below the surface at the gestures you make, and I have come to recognize your gestures of love.

You have supported me for many years through a lot different things

Don’t give up on us

Marriage goes through many cycles

Goals, Dreams, Ambition, Fun, Love, Time, Together, No matter what

“I can’t help falling in love with you” (our wedding song)

From the day you gave me my first mixed tape

Through the birth of our two beautiful girls

Timeless

I will continue to grow

I will try to relax and appreciate my family more

I will make more time for you and our girls

I will remember that sometimes it does pay to take 5more minutes to enjoy something

I will not make dirty dishes an earth shattering event

I will continue to stay true to myself

We came so very close to calling it quits a few months ago-during that time I felt you were the most honest with me you have ever been. You seemed so vulnerable.

You shared my cancer scare with me-I was so terrified that I would never see you our girls again.

We need to work on forgiveness-of one another’s short comings. Of one another’s mistakes.

You are hilarious!

You make me think, you challenge me.

You compliment me better than I ever thought possible

Today I accept this ring as an everlasting symbol of my commitment to you and to us.

I cannot wait to see what the future holds for us

Third Entry
March 19, 2009, 12:34 pm-1:34 pm

My renewal vows are harder to write than I thought they would be. I have so many things to say and I don’t want to be overly cheesy. It works best for me when I begin writing and get something down, then go back and re-read it. I have to do this re-reading part at least a thousand times and then I start to get where I want.

First attempt:
Steve, over the last 5 years I have come to love and appreciate you more than I ever thought it possible to love and appreciate someone.
I push just to see how far I can and you never budge. You provide me with unending support. I have learned so many things from you about love, patience, acceptance and letting go.

March 19, 2009, 7:17pm-9:00pm

Second attempt:
Well here we are, 5 years later, and as I promised we are in Vegas getting married by Elvis.
Our marriage has been a challenging journey. We came together as a couple that was already enduring many stresses, and over the years our relationship has continued to overcome many obstacles. We have withstood challenges that should have crumpled our relationship and we did so by believing in each other and in our marriage.

I am stubborn as hell and sometimes I push just to see how far I can. But you never waiver, you allow me time and space and provide me with constant support. I have learned a great deal from you, about love, patience, acceptance, and letting go.

As we move forward I promise to try to relax and appreciate our family more, I will continue to grow, I will try to remember that sometimes it does pay to take an extra 5 minutes to enjoy something and that dirty dishes are not an earth shattering event.

Today, at this moment, I want to recommit myself to you and our marriage.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Champagne Taste with a Beer Budget

As silly as it sounds, many brides come to me with grandiose ideas and a budget that frankly just does not support those ideas. It's okay to want the dream wedding and the fairy tale ending, as long as you are realistic about what you budget allows you to do. If you are creative and willing to compromise, you can have a truly elegant wedding for not a lot of money. I planned my own wedding for a total of about $3,000. This included the ceremony at a bed and breakfast, a small reception afterward with finger foods, a cake and a champagne toast. I only had about 30 guests, but it was perfect! I got several compliments on what a great wedding it was! As you plan your special tday try to remember what a wedding is really about. It's not about fancy flowers, elaborate cake decorations and designer dresses. It's about celebrating love and cherishing a moment when friends and family can come together to remember that love is what is makes the world go round.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Trend Report 2009

Getting married in soon? Check out the latest trends for 2009 as reported by January/February issue of Bridal Guide.

Decor- Use lots of eye popping color. Use bold colors and lights and/or candles to create a really colorful and magical ambiance. Also make the bar a focal point, instead of having several small bars, try to have one long bar that stretches along a wall.

Cocktails- Incorporate mint and fresh squeezed lime juice into some of the drinks. They give drinks a refreshing feel. Consider having trays passed around with beverages on them. These concoctions could be placed in smaller glasses, like shot glasses, to give them a more chic look.

Food- Use local ingredients. Regional food is the way to go for 2009. Cannot decide between beef or chicken? Sliced New York Strip is #1.

Flowers- Roses are not the "in" bloom anymore. Use lush romantic bright blooms instead. You can also mix up the height of the centerpieces, have some tall and some short ones. Place these centerpieces in colored vases if possible, color is hot this season!

Cakes- Tall and slender is the way to go in 2009! Use bold colors and glam it up with some pearls or jeweled buckles, whatever will give it a shiny or sparkly flare. Keep your flavors simple so the guests can indulge in the high quality ingredients.

For more ideas and trends for 2009, check out Bridal Guide's January/Frebruary edition or www.bridalguide.com.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Make the Most of your Flowers

Here is a money saving tip that makes the most of the your bouquets.

Use the bride's bouquet for the centerpiece of the sweetheart table, or if the bride and groom are sitting at the head table with the rest of the wedding party, use her bouquet as the center most floral arrangement. Then place the bridesmaids' bouquets in vases on either side of the center. You can also substitute some of your other centerpieces with the bridesmaids' bouquets if you don't want to use them at the head table.

Be creative and make the most of the money you spend on your flowers!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Tips on Tipping

It's customary to tip those vendors who have helped make your wedding day special, but how do you know how much to tip? It's best to keep this tipping schedule in mind when you figure out your budget. That way, you don't get stuck the day of with no money left and vendors who feel slighted.



This list comes from Sharon Naylor, author of The Essential Guide to Wedding Etiquette.



Event planner (optional) 10-20 percent of your bill.

Note: If you are planning to tip your consultant, try to hire one with packages that offer fixed costs instead of a planner who charges by the hour or based on services provided. This makes it much easier to budget your tip into your overall costs.



Officiant $50-$100



Ceremony musicians $20-$30



Reception site manager 15-20 percent of the entire reception site bill



Valets $1-$2 per car



Waiters $20-$30 each (depending on service quality)

Note: Some catering services or reception locations may include a tip for the waiters in the cost. Be sure to ask so you know whether or not to tip.



Bartenders 15 percent of the liquor bill

Note: Some catering services or reception locations may include a tip for the bartenders in the cost. Be sure to ask so you whether or not to tip.



Coat Check $1 per coat



Photographer/Videographer $30-$100 or more (unless these vendors own their own studios)



Delivery Workers $10 each if only dropping items off, $20 each if dropping off and setting up.



Tent Assemblers $20 each, more if the tent is complicated or if flooring is also put down.



Reception Musicians $25-$30 each, $50-$100 for a DJ



Hair and Makeup 15 to 20 percent of the bill



Cleanup crew $20 each



Limo Drivers 15 to 20 percent of the transportation bill.

Note: Sometimes the tip has been included in the cost of the bill, so be sure to ask if it's included.






Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Albuquerque Turkey

My husband and two children and I are leaving for Albuquerque, New Mexico tomorrow. We are excited to be getting out of town for a few days but dreading the 10-13 hours in the car with a two year old and a four year old. My husband is originally from Arlington, TX, I am from Waynesboro, VA, and I like to believe that fate brought us together in New Mexico. We both moved from the east coast within weeks of each other, we first met at Chili's restaurant where we waited tables together. Friendship turned into dating and dating into marriage. Both of our children were born in Albuquerque so it will be neat to take them back.



New Mexico is such a beautiful state. It gets more sunshine than any other state in the US, including "The sunshine state". A film studio was recently opened there because of the diverse scenery that is available to film directors and producers. Just about any landscape that's desired can be found somewhere in the state. The food is fantastic as well! If you've ever had green chili then you will understand that since moving Texas, my husband and I are longing for green chili. It's in everything in New Mexico!! Hatch, New Mexico is where the best green chilies are grown and then shipped all over the southwest. The official state question is actually "red or green?" That's because on just about anything you order you will be asked if you want red or green-chilies of course!


If you ever have a chance to visit the state I highly recommend seeing the Taos Gorge Bridge. There is a scene from the movie Natural Born Killers where Micky and Malory get married on the bridge. They carve their initials on it, supposedly those initials really are there but in the many times I have been, I have yet to find them.

Anyway, it will be really nice to escape Big D for a few days and retreat to a place that's known for putting things off until tomorrow.